Sometimes I think that we have been in the wilderness for a really long time. It gets so tiring, but I feel like God is doing something awesome with our family. I have prayed for years for Wayne to be the spiritual leader, provider for our family, and for him to be successful. If is painful to see your husband try so hard and not achieve the things that he wants for his family. This is not the way that I thought it would all work out, but I know it is for the glory of God.
As I received the news that Wayne was accepted for his new job, I just cried. I am torn between happiness, fear of change, and sadness. I was reminded at Bible Study that the wilderness was for 40 years and that it was caused mostly from the Israelites holding on to things of the "old self". I pray that we separately we can surrender everything to Him and release anything that we are holding on to. I will miss my husband very much (I cry daily), but I know that this is only for a little while. If we just surrender to the Mighty One, the end is The Jordan :-)
Fear has no room here with me. God has put in place a group of Godly men and woman that have surrounded me in prayer and encouragement. I have people that I can call on if something happens.
Thank you Lord for your Love and kindness towards my family and I. I deserve death, but you love me so much that you do the smallest things that my heart desires. You know my desires to be with my husband daily, or even weekly. You have given him a relationship with his children that can never be taken away. Thank you, Father. I ask that you redeem him that and bring him home soon. I will continue Lord to live daily and come to you with every breath. You are my breath, my life, my comfort, my home. I pray that we can lift your name higher than these "things" that happen to us. I want you to be the center of all our praise. Please bless the ones that are praying fervently for us, abundantly. I pray for the desires of their heart to be fulfilled. Wayne was blind and now he can see! Boy, Lord that is such a miracle within itself...so many testimonies. You are wonderful, Father. I love you and ask for your peace to reign down on my family each day.
